Oprah Know She Said...

Okay, now since O came out about her weight, she's been complaining. Or venting. Or simply telling her story. Over the past year we've all noticed the bulge and I personally think as women, our weight naturally fluctuates due to hormones, life and stress.

Hey Oprah! - ISH happens!

Yesterday I caught her show and she just happened to be sitting kinda irregular. Her arms covered her midriff and she sat on her right side the entire time. Now she already put her numbers out there, why is she still trying to hide her pudge?

She's not the 1st to gain back weight and she won't be the last. A few years back MadTV joked about her having a "skinny" camera that took away the poundage as opposed to the other cameras that packed it on. I've been thinking... with a personal chef, personal trainer, and a personal stylist, she has no reason not to stay on point. But then again, she's like most of us and most of us who go through life's changes and shemotions, would probably dismiss our personal people after awhile and handle business as best as we know how. She probably said...

To her personal chef, Oprah probably said…

At breakfast time...
"I’m feeling slightly melancholy, this morning I think I’ll have a cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese and jelly, a hot chocolate and a banana for my potassium…"
Instead of saying... "Yum, bran cereal again!"

At lunch time...
"Don’t worry about lunch, Gayle is picking me up a hoagie from Blimpies…"
Instead of saying... "Yum, green salad and bland grilled chicken with nooooo dressing!"

At dinner time...
Oh thank you but I picked up an Entenmanns’s cake on my way in… and I'll eat this while sitting in front of the TV...
Instead of saying... "Yum, baked fish and veggies!"

To her personal trainer, Oprah probably said…

"When we come back around that corner, can we stop in Burger King? I'm feeling like a sausage croissant this morning?"
Instead of saying... "Let's walk another half a mile, me and Gayle had a big dinner last night."

"No I'm not putting on weight, I'm just bloated silly!
Instead of saying... "Well you know Stedman bought home some chocolate cake last night and I kinda ate the whole thing, except for the slice I gave to Sted."

"Absolutely not, I am not doing another 30 minutes on this treadmill!"
Instead of saying... "I'm sure you can tell by my heavy breathing that I'm tired and packing on the pounds, perhaps we should try another type of workout for motivation."

To her personal stylist, Oprah probably said…

"Ummm, no more pastel colored suits in size 10s, ok?"
Instead of saying... "It's quite obvious that I'm not pushing away plates so can you please bring me a couple of size 14s for me to try on? In BLACK please."

"Ummm, no more form fitting lycra dresses, ok?"
Instead of saying... "I'm going to need 2 pairs of Spanx and a long sweater to cover the backside, please, thank you."

"No more white, winter white or knit, no more, ok?"
Instead of saying... "I can wear denim, wools, heavy cottons and long flowy shirts, got that? Thanks!"

Of course I'm only poking fun and making Oprah out to be grumpy. Why? Because we are all grumpy when our clothes no longer fit and we look at ourselves in the mirror and can't stand what we see. But really, Oprah has a stylist who can hook her up and over the years, she's still looked fabulous and I'm sure once she figures out what's holding her back from keeping her on her road to fitness, she'll be back on the cover of her magazine, baring it all for the world to see.

By the way, Happy Birthday Oprah!!!

... Like That

I was over at True Urban Queen's Queendom earlier today and she posted on one of my favorite movies. Back in 2005 Oprah produced the movie adaptation of Their Eyes Were Watching God, and just as I was captivated in 1994 when I first read the novel written by the esteemed Zora Neale Hurston, I was blown away by the visual portrayal.

I always wanted a man like...
Teacake. Carefree. Confident. Courageous. Oh Teacake seemed like a big ole mistake in the making and although he was 12 years younger than Janie, he was a man's man. In the movie when he told her that they will live off of the money that he makes... Shoot, that's exactly what I was referring to a couple of weeks ago when I posted on my future superman.

I always wanted a love like...
The fervency in which Teacake loved Janie. It wasn't about status or titles. It wasn't about Janie's looks or how much money she had. Their love manifested itself in their freedom to be, grow and flow with each other. I've always wanted someone I can be free with. Someone who seemingly freed me. Someone I can be me with and not worry about the upkeep of my hair or my nails or my outer beautifications.

Lastly, I've always wanted...

A kiss like...



That kiss... takes my breath away every time I see it.

Little Boom

This is my Little Boom. He's my play cousin's youngest of 4, and only son, and my Auntie V's grandson. I pray Boom Sr. stops overpopulating the planet with chirren. I would swoop this bundle of joy from him but he's only got one boy and I wouldn't want to hurt his father like that.

Message From the Universe

Just to be extra clear, there is absolutely no connection between the global economy and your freedom to think as you please. Nor is there any connection between the global economy and my ability to shock and delight, suddenly and without warning.
I think that pretty much takes care of everything,

The Universe

http://www.tut.com/

Random Words I Type

"I don't just want to have a boyfriend-I could have five boyfriends. I want someone who is part of my destiny." India.Arie -Essence, June 2002

I have an on the job friend who offers to take me to lunch, offers to pay my cell phone bill, and just last year offered take me to Paris. I'm sure he's a wonderful man and I could accept the material gifts he has to offer but right now that's not enough.

I ended my 4 year relationship last year and started up a new rendezvous that I believe has suffered its last fizzle just today. I'm okay with putting my past to bed and I'm moving forward to the better that life offers because I've learned to appreciate myself and damnit, I deserve it.

When I hung up with my friend who was making demands on me yet not carrying any weight or making his presence known in this relationship, that experience only reinforced how great and wonderful I truly am. I have no reason to settle.

I believe that compromises should be made in relationships. You have to carve out time that you would normally spend with your girls or time spent with your boys but one demand I will never adhere to... Quieting my voice.

For the next dude who comes my way... Please know that I love and appreciate chivalry but that's only the beginning. You have to be emotionally stable, financially responsible and doing a great job prioritizing your life, i.e. spending quality time with your child/children.

I have standards and for the first time in years I'm truly going to stick to them. I love The Happy Go Lucky Bachelor's Deal Breakers. Everyone should have and know what their deal breakers are. And keep to them. Why should anyone settle for less just to say that they have?

I am an established, stable woman. For me, it's only up from here. If you're still trying to find and redefine yourself and you're over 35 years of age, I am not your type of woman. That is not to say that there is no room for growth or to improve oneself. That should be done daily.

When I read India.Arie's article in Essence almost 7 years ago, that comment above has stuck with me since. I too want someone who is part of the intricacies of me, my growing, my aging, my creativity - finding joy in just getting to know and loving me.

But not right now...

I'm still bursting from the excitement that this new year has already brought in. Already this month, I'm doing new things and living purposefully. Plus I LOVE spending time alone. Sure it would be nice to have someone to go to events with or someone waiting at home for me to tell about my day. However, when the time is right, I know my destiny man will come along and I'll be ready for him when he arrives.

Superwoman needs a Superman

I make no bones about it, I don't even pretend to be anything other than what I am.

I'm a big girl.

I've posted my pics a couple of times and it's not hard to see.

I own my weight and as I've said before, I looooooooove my shape.

Do you see those hips?

But when it comes to men, I happen to be attracted to tall, husky, robust men. I'm an equal opportunity dater and personality trumps looks anyday but my eyes glaze over significantly and my heart thumps fervently over a well built man.
I suppose I simply want to feel like the man in my life can protect me. And that really has nothing to do with size or shape but it has everything to do with his frame of mind.

Let's just say that my door bells rings in the middle of the night. My man is over at my place. He looks at me as if to say, "Who's at your door?". I look back as if to say, "T'hell if I know, it's 2:00 in the d*mn morning!". Why should I be the one to go to the door to see who's there while my man, who is well and able-bodied, sleeps comfortably in my bed? Now suppose it's some crazy dude at my door? Some maniac coming to attack? Who better to handle some mess in the middle of the night than a big ole strong and burly man?!?!

No bruh, I a need Melvin from "Baby Boy" or a Mann from "Rosewood"! Figuratively and/or literally. I need a take charge kind of a man who can allow this superwoman to take off her cape and just be a lady, a damsel in distress.

I don't need Neyo writing no songs for me. Alicia Keys, though I like her music, I don't care to hear another song about another independent superwoman. I think those songs affect men in all of the wrong ways because when I need some security and protection, that a true man should supply, in no way do I want to positive self-talk myself into handling some crazy behind situation that is beyond my grip.

This Superwoman needs a Superman - I should have added that to my love list.
In every sense, I will be the Lois to his Clark.

Now I know nobody wants to get hurt and I'm not saying that my man should engage in brawls or have weapons stashed on his person. I'm not saying that a man should never show emotion or cry or express himself. I'm definitely not talking a man being overly tough or thuggish, brutish.

But I am saying... Leave out machismo. A man should be responsible and speak up for his lady, defend his lady - not if he has to but because he has to.

It's less than 1.00%!

Ok, today I received my paycheck and I don't even open it. I really don't open any of my checks so I really don't know what bi-weekly pay looks like. That's bad because the establishment could be jipping me and I wouldn't even know until I go to pay my bills.

Shortly after receiving the check I receive an email stating that our raises from 2008 are reflected in this current check. NOW I'm excited! I'm ripping off the perforations, busting the check open all wrong, 'cause I don't know how, and I look at the total. I don't see a difference.

So I go online to look at my bank account to see what my salary usually is.

The difference is $10.35

I'm grateful, I really am. But I'm not excited. People were doing back flips after reading the email. Cartwheels over the book trucks. You could hear hooping and hollering in the hallways. Clearly we did not see the 0.##%, we just saw raise. I received an IM from one of my buddies. He says "Yeeeeaaaaa! A raise!" My reply was - "You can't be serious!"

Yes we library workers are some starving folk and since we're unionized, we don't receive annual salary increases. :( I knew exactly what I was getting into when I entered this profession. So we just wait out the 3 to 4 years for an increase and go berserk for the large retroactive check. However, next pay period we're supposed to receive our retroactive monies. I guess then I'll join the masses, doing back spins on the library floor.