Growing up my mother always told me that I will say the wrong thing if I talk too much and sure enough I caught enough slaps and hits for saying something out of turn or for talking too much in school.
I talk a lot. I am not ashamed to tell my business, especially when I know it can benefit someone else. I talk about my relationships, particularly with my friends or co-workers and don’t let something go down in my relationship because I will run and tell them how HE done made me mad. I talk about the good in my relationship and CB can tell you how I make her ear bleed and her stomach queasy with my love and lust stories.
I talk about my family, the good family and their funny stories and I tell about family gone bad. That cousin who in 1985 made Christmas bad for everybody by stealing everything from under that tree and selling it all for crack.
I talk about my financial situation, when it’s good and when it’s bad. When my people see me pull out my change purse and pay for my whole meal with dimes, they know I’m low on funds. When I’m not eating lunch and drinking tea that I borrowed from the office pantry, I’m in a financial funk. I have no problem explaining why my bag is so heavy – it’s because I have to run to Commerce (now TD Bank) to the penny arcade!
I just really try not to hide my truth.
I remember the time when I saw an interview with Alice Walker (I’ve spoken about this before) but what resonates within me is her candidness. She spoke of how she was blinded by her brother, the abuse one of her grandmother’s suffered, abortions. Me and DC sat their astonished and we both left saying that we wanted to be that truthful, that open.
* Some days my pendulum swings between id and ego erratically.
* I used to say that I’m jealous but I realized recently that I’m not. I choose my new quality - Guarded.
* I am mostly frugal but when it comes to jeans, costume jewelry and bags, I will splurge.
* I am a stickler for time but I am always late or rushing.
* In relationships, I love hard and I give my all. I’m usually not jealous or guarded when I’m secure in my worth.
* I am Ms. Independent with my girls but with my man, I am putty.
* I am a procrastinator in ALL things.
* I am a ride or die friend. If there is any way to say or display my loyalty, I show and prove.
* I love my family. I’d give a lung, kidney, bone marrow, and blood, whatever is necessary to save the life of anyone of them. Yes, that even goes for that crackhead cousin of mine. And I want to always be close to them, which explains why I didn’t move all over the world like my brother and the truth is, they need me as much as I need them.
* I’m selfish with my food. Food is sacred to me and when I sit down to eat and I know my food is going to be slamming, I do not want to look over and see some hungry eyes but… I almost always spill my food and on my clothes. (That’s probably the portion I should have shared).
* I look for errors and if anyone around me says a wrong word or uses a word in the wrong tense, before I can think about it, I am correcting them. The other day my supervisor said, “Who stealed it?” Oh we all fell out laughing as I said “Stealed, stealed!”
* Speaking of words… I tell anyone around me… please be careful with your use of words because I take everything literally. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it.
* I am a church girl but I got a potty mouth. :O It’s bad of me, I know. It's no secret that I get my sailor's mouth from my parents. My mother tells me that she likes my profane flow but that my mouth and face just don't go together. I AM WORKING ON IT!
That's simply skimming the surface...