Showing posts with label anger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anger. Show all posts

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Let it Flow

Let it flow... life... the stress... the forgiveness... the healing.

I am not well. I am not rested. My body hurts, my mind hurts. My thoughts are no longer conveyed as fluidly as I'd like them to be. I'm a better writer than a talker right now... :(
I love to talk so it's annoying me.

I'm breathing out... frustration, shame, guilt, anger, anxiety, confusion, loneliness, jealousy, insecurity, busyness, and insignificance.

And I'm breathing in... serenity, hope, trust, patience, acceptance, significance, peace, optimism, courage, understanding, adequacy, positive energy, and appreciation.

I'm treading through this season. I'm looking up. I'm looking within. And as Monique reminded me... "This Too Shall Pass".



Monday, December 3, 2007

I Just Want to Be Mad

I wanna be so mad today. I had the most frustrating weekend and a horrible commute in to work this morning. I am tired, feeling drained, I don't want to work and the Monday blues is kicking my butt. I was upset on my way in and had no way to release the anger that I started to tear up on the train but this is NYC and believe me a tearing chick gets no concern, which was fine by me. Especially today.
I can't believe that I actually want to hold on to the anger - LOL. I usually try to be a bounce back kind of woman but clearly not today. Needless to say holding on to the anger didn't work.
I get to the job and I check my job email. I sent out a "Something to take you back!!!!, Remember when" email on Friday to my buddies who are actually old enough to have 80s flashbacks. Some of the people/groups were JJ Fad, Bobby Brown, The Real Roxanne, Whodini and others. I sent the email to one of my oldest friends who I still like and don't mind keeping in contact with. His reply to me was "Dag. I remember you had that New Edition album and kept playing it and playing it and playing it and playing it." All I could do was laugh because he would come chill out at my house all of the time, because I was older than him and I had my own personal stereo in my own room. New Edition was the hottest group and I would just melt over Ralph's voice as his sang Jealous Girl and Popcorn Love - I loveded it!
I sat here smiling until my supervisor decided to come over and load up the work on me... so then the anger returned.
My co-worker was passing by and she greeted me with a hello and I looked straight in her face and ignored her. Mind you I get confrontational when she does the same thing to me and clearly she's not too happy about it either because she throws a balled up paper towel at me.
Now we do very unprofessional things at the workplace and my supervisor sits right behind me and diagonal from the crazy co-worker but my supervisor is not her supervisor so she can reprimand me but not my co-worker. However, the little girls within us wanted to play today and we decided to let them have their way and I threw a small bottle of lotion at her (it was the first thing I could get my hands on) and then I threw 2 pens at her. The lotion hit her but she dodged the pens. It was too funny and it was enough for me to stop fretting about things beyond my control.