Sunday, October 19, 2008


Some people say that their are only 2 root emotions and they are FEAR and LOVE. And all other emotions stem from them. As with most emotions, one must choose which will lead their words, their behavior, their lives.

I believe that no one wants to choose fear.

However by focusing on the things that cause us to fear, fear may just be intensified.

I sometimes have a fear of falling down the stairs. I've actually fallen down quite a few steps in my life. What that fear has done is made me aware and I take precaution before descending down any flight of stairs.

Yet some fear that they are unworthy of good things or good people. Some fear embarrassment, failure or rejection. Because of that fear, some may be angry, they may lash out, they may close themselves off from others.

However... LOVE

"Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury,
it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails..."

Love is peaceful, it is freeing, it is forgiving. I think that everyone truly wants to choose love but sometimes they just don't know how to. It's certainly not easy to choose love. By choosing love you are tolerant with yourself and others. You look your fears in the face and say "thank you for-giving..." For giving me that grief, that anger, that selfishness and turn that grief into joy, that anger into calm and that selfishness into compassion. Choosing takes a lot of work.

I'm making quite a few transitions in my life lately and I find myself getting caught up in my fears. I've been in my I want what I want when I want it phase. I've been controlling, arrogant, and lashing out from my insecurities.

But today I choose Love. All of my fears, I bless them. Because like my fear of falling down the steps, I take the precaution of going slower, holding on to the banister in life and being aware of every thing, person, and situation I encounter. I choose to be honest with myself. I carry a journal and jot down my fears as they appear and affirm each one of them with something positive.

All fears may not truly go away but the response time should rise by choosing and giving power over to Love.


Lovebabz said...

Beautifully said!

Watching you stretch and grow on your blog is a wondeful thing to be a part of! You are sharing some profound life lessons Sister!

I am on vacation but I had to comment on this very profound post! I am so moved by it. It is exactly what I needed to hear today.

clnmike said...

Very well said.

The True Urban Queen aka Sharon said...

How touching.

I have tears in my eyes and had to read this again. And again.

You are so wonderful and you have spoken to my heart.

I need to remind myself of this post all day.

Kiayaphd said...

By choosing love you are tolerant with yourself and others. You look your fears in the face and say "thank you for-giving..."

Yep, this is it right here! Thanks, sis

MzTeeJaye said...

This is beautiful- thank you for the inspiration. I too will try to consciously choose love in the face of fear.

Kay C, The Quiet Storm said...

Sometimes when fear gets a reign on you it is hard to shake it off. I applaud you for choosing love. I know it will be rewarding.

I think I will start the journal you were speaking of. Every little bit helps ;)

MsKnowitAll said...

Thank you Sister Lovebabz. I pray you are enjoying every moment of your vacation!

Thank you much Mike.

Thank you Queen Sharon.

Kiaya... it's not easy. I sometimes hold on to my fears and anchor on them. For-giving is the greatest closure.

MzTeeJaye... Thank you! It's really all about being conscious about our fears and learning to not let them control and dictate us.

Kay C... The journal is such a tremendous help. I also started a compliment journal, an idea I got from one of your posts.

CapCity said...

Hey Sistah KiA - It's been too long, but THIS post must've been calling me! Fear itself is my greatest fear:-). I'm always reading books on overcoming it, etc. because I don't want to be controlled by it. I recently saw a woman on the train reading: The Gift of Fear (which I want to check out, now). Though, I DO like your solution: turn it over to love...

MsKnowitAll said...

Hey CapCity!!! I've missed you!
I think I have to check out that book too. Thanks for the link.

Ticia said...

I am scurred of loving... I will write a post about it!

I am scurred of opening up!

Monique said...

I Corinthians 13.

Hangs on the wall beside my bed. My ex actually sung this to me one night at an open mic. There is no greater love than divine love.

Here's one my favorite love quotes:

A woman's heart should be so deeply hidden with in the Lord that [the] man should have to seek Him the find her.